Check Your Heart Before You Type

Sunday, August 30, 2020
Rampant social media bullying makes me wonder, do people check their heart before they open their mouth. Or, maybe these people's heart is really just wicked and they don't care who they hurt with their words.

After learning about the passing of Chadwick Boseman and then the cyberbullying prior to his death I was sick to my stomach. To be honest I had no idea he had lost weight or that he was battling cancer. And, where others may have known Boseman had lost weight from pictures, they had no idea of his struggles. I keep my exposure to social media at a minimum for this very reason. 


You can never know the fullness of a person's life by looking at pictures of them on social media. To assume you know and then make comments to support your assumption is slanderous and accusatory. It seems like instead of adding value to the world, people try to figure out the worst and most hurtful thing to say to a person on these platforms.


They throw racists, sexist, and demeaning comments around like they'll get some type of award for being the most heartless, jerk they can be. I'm not claiming to be a saint on social media, however, I do make sure that my intentions are pure before I comment. I don't set out to intentionally hurt others for a laugh or to get my point across during a debate.   


I used to say, "Check your heart before you open your mouth." However, with the rampant cyberbullying that I've witnessed, I think it's appropriate to change this phrase to, "Check your heart before you type." Here are some things to consider being you press enter to add your comment or post to the Twitterverse:


What are your intentions for that comment?

Is your comment meant to be rude, mean, offputting, or hurt someone just for the sake of being hurtful? Are you that miserable in your own life that you must go around hurting others so that they feel your pain? If your comment doesn't actually add value then please keep it to yourself. And "fat" shaming someone or making fun of the way they look will not help them to get into shape. This is the type of behavior that eating disorders and depression are birthed out of.    


Is your comment purely about someone's physical appearance? 

First of all, why do YOU believe it's your business or job to critique someone else's appearance? Are you really that shallow and believe that a person's worth is measured by their physical appearance? And how old are you, isn't that middle school behavior? Let's grow-up and start caring about the things that really matter like world hunger, social injustice, human trafficking, or where this next set of stimulus money is going to come from.   


Chadwich Boseman's passing has taught us that we must make sure we have pure intentions before posting comments to social media.

Do you use Pinterest? Consider posting this to one of your favorite boards.



Just because you experienced it, doesn't make it true.

Whatever you've been through in your life is your own experience, not the way the world is. Furthermore, your experiences do not translate across the board or speak for everyone. Not all cops are bad, not all black people are criminals, and not all white people are racist. Just because you had a few bad experiences doesn't mean that your opinions, expectations, and judgments are accurate. Don't be so self-centered as to think that what happens in your life should be the norm of the general public.   


Would you say what your about to type to that person's face?

I've come to realize that a lot of people who make these mean or racist comments online would never say those things in public or to someone's face. Most of these people are really just cowards as evidenced by the numerous people who apologize for their insensitive remarks after they've been called out about them. If they had integrity and weren't such cowards, they would stand by their comments and suffer the consequences of a lost job or lost sponsorships. The truth is they're not really about that life, so when challenged they cave. 


Every social media post isn't meant for YOU.

Sometimes it's a case of 'nobody asked you.' It amazes me how many people will go on someone else's post and comment on things that were obviously not pertaining to them. For example, if I'm talking to black people, your "white" opinion surely isn't needed, and vice versa. If a post is specific to women, we don't need a male perspective on it. The bottom line is, certain segments of the population have unique experiences that do not translate to other segments of the population. So, save your opinion for those times that you have real value to add, not when you just want to have something to say.   


Stop policing other people's pages.   

The social media police are the worst. They spend their time telling people what they should think, feel, and say on their personal/business pages; as if they have some authority over other people's lives. They report posts as being offensive instead of moving on about their own business. Yes, posts that promote illegal activity like harming children should be reported, but just because you don't agree with someone's political views doesn't make what they said offensive. If they have followers there is obviously an entire segment of people that want to hear what they have to say. If you're not one of those people, just move on with your life and go be great somewhere else. I've watched some pretty amazing and inspiring videos on Youtube, and upon looking at the likes and dislikes think, "Who are these people who dislike inspiration?"  


Be so busy minding your own business that you don't have time to watch what other people are doing.

Why do you have so much time to comment on other people's posts anyway? Do you not have enough things going on in your own life to keep you busy? This idea of jumping from post to post making negative comments is so prevalent that it has a term; "trolling." Don't be a troll. Pick up a new hobby, read a book, watch a Chadwick Boseman movie, but for goodness sake, STOP BEING A TROLL.




Chadwick Boseman will always be remembered for his impact on the culture and his charity work. What will you be remembered for?    








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